Welcome to Punching Pete Campbell’s third edition of the Game of Thrones Power Rankings. Before proceeding, be sure to review last week’s rankings to track the movement. It wasn’t a great episode this week, but we’ve got a new face (or two) vying for the top spot while some of last week’s major climbers tumbled out of the top 10.

Three major factors go into our rankings: 1) overall likability/how much we want the character to die, 2) developments from the most recent episode and 3) how much actual power the characters currently hold in the show. And of course, there’s our own subjectivity, which we won’t hide.

One last very important order of business: SPOILER ALERT: The following entries contain information from the most recent episode of Game of Thrones: “A Man Without Honor” (Season 2, Episode 7).

1. Stannis Baratheon (previously 1): Fittingly, the man synonymous with honor didn’t appear in “A Man Without Honor.” We did, however, get a crucial update on Stannis’ whereabouts during Tyrion’s late-episode exchange with Cersei. In addition to boasting 100,000 bannermen, a fire priestess who can birth shadow babies and a legitimate claim to the Iron Throne, Stannis now commands 200 ships. And as Cersei notes (and Tyrion confirms): “That’s more than we have.” Stannis’ fleet is four or five days out from King’s Landing, which means two things: It’s almost finale time. And it’s almost wildfire time.
– MR

2. Xaro Xhoan Daxos, King of Qarth & Pyat Pree, Warlock (previously unranked): Major moves toward the top of the Power Rankings this week. These dragon thieves boast a deadly combination: Xaro (above) is the richest man in Qarth, overflowing with ambition and also has an uncanny ability to bore his enemies to death by constantly repeating tales of his past. It’s hard to get a read on the creepy blue-lipped-Smeagol doppelganger-partner-Warlock-dude to know the full extent of his power, but a blade can’t kill him and he can multiply like Godzilla to simultaneously open windpipes (for the less nerdy: Godzilla procreates with itself). Their plot to steal Dany’s dragons and wax the rest of the Thirteen went off without a hitch. Money, power, dragons and minimal competition? Dangerous. On another note, does this pair remind any else of a slightly more diverse Twins? Seemingly innocent big fella teams up with shriveled weasel and shady shenanigans ensues? I smell a spinoff!
– CW

3. Tyrion Lannister (previously 2): No major moves for Tyrion this week, but he remains in the top three behind the strength of his previous maneuvering. The Hand of the King continues to establish himself as the shrewdest personality in Westeros, boasting both the cunning and grammar (“tactics,” not “strategy”) to overcome his literal and hierarchical shortcomings. That, and he has wildfire. Though Tyrion had just two minutes of (immensely enjoyable) screen time in “A Man Without Honor,” he still maintains 7,000-plus pods of the Game of Thrones’ equivalent of napalm. That’s enough to cook Stannis’ entire army to a blackened (and potentially Bran and Rickon-like) crisp.
– BG

4. Theon Greyjoy (previously 5): Theon subscribes to the philosophy that it’s better to be feared than loved, and his actions in “A Man Without Honor” fall perfectly in line with that belief. He killed Ser Rodrik last week to prove he won’t stand for his authority being challenged, then ass-whooped the minion who opened this week’s episode by pointing out that Bran, Rickon, Hodor and Osha escaped because Theon was too busy getting his longsword polished. Theon wouldn’t let Maester Luwin sway him from pursuing Bran and Rickon with horses and hounds, and he made Luwin and all of Winterfell gather round as he raised two charred, unrecognizable young bodies in the courtyard. Are they Bran and Rickon? Are they the two young farm boys who were unlucky enough to cross paths with Theon and some walnut shells? Either way, Theon has shown that nothing is more important than his quest for power and respect. As Rodrik predicted, Theon is truly lost.
– MR

5. Tywin Lannister (previously 4): Despite his status as a Lannister, Tywin has become unmistakably likable. His encounters with Arya are consistently the most compelling of the show, and perhaps more than anybody, he grasps the significance of the situation at hand (“This will be my last war, win or lose.”). But when will he make a move? Tywin seems all too content matching wits with his cupbearer, contemplating his distaste for mutton rather than mounting any sort of offensive. He’s the anti-Theon: plotting, not doing. With the ever-dangerous Jaqen H’ghar lurking in Harrenhal, that idleness prompts a slight drop in the rankings.
– BG

6. Catelyn Stark (previously On the King’s Road): Zoinks! Did she or didn’t she?! In her son’s absence, Cat calmed a potential riot within the camp as angry lords quibbled over who gets Jamie Lannister’s pretty gold head as a new mantelpiece. The Kingslayer’s getaway attempt was quickly foiled, but not before he killed another high lord’s son. Back in his cage, it seemed his plan all along was to book a trip to the Seven Hells, and pushing Cat to the brink of her grief may be the most competitive rates. His trouble focusing on that task was rather enjoyable — “Seriously, where the hell did you get this beast?” — but he was able to hit Cat’s buttons enough to set up one of the crueler cliffhangers: “Brianne, your sword!” I was cheering for the execution, but once those credits started rolling and no Lannister blood had been shed (well, except for that other Lannister, the cousin… Sorry, pal, better luck next life.), painful speculations crept into my mind. Put simply, I fear for the safety of my fellow viewers if next week’s episode starts and Jamie is dead.
– CW

7. Robb Stark (previously 6):  Dude, quit chasing tail and focus! I know you want to be there when your foot-sawing love-toy picks out her tools (“Which saw is kinkier, rigid teeth or double-edged?”), but shit is going down and you’re nowhere to be seen! Robb was largely absent this episode. He drops a spot after unknowingly sending a Lannister to his death and thus setting in motion a chain of events that could jeopardize the whole war. Plus, he still doesn’t hold his own castle and, after the events at Winterfell, it’s very possible he’s the only chance of keeping the Stark name alive. Quick woman, get to amputating! We need the King in the North to get randy right away!
– CW

8. Arya Stark (previously 7): Like many other characters on this week’s list, Arya’s episode was mostly uneventful. She showed off her sticker-worthy knowledge of history and explained that “most girls are idiots,” a sentiment that caused Tywin to liken her to Cersei.  That’s pretty much it. But despite her charm, Arya is getting cocky, and such carelessness could prove costly. If she continues to come across as “too smart for [her] own good,” she may never get the chance to proper properly exact revenge on Joffrey, Ilyn Payne and the like.
– BG

9. Ygritte/the wildlings (previously unranked): Not since Harry Potter has a fantasy epic produced so many loveable redheads. This was a breakthrough episode for our favorite foul-mouthed wildling, who tormented her sulky capture with boner jokes (“Did you pull a knife on me in the night?”), masturbation knocks (No sex with woman, man or beast? “With your hands, then? No wonder you’re all so miserable.”) and very graphic flirting (“It’s wet and warm.”). But she’s more than just a potty mouth with a pretty face: As soon as Jon lets down his guard — and, presumably, as soon as she senses her fellow wildlings nearby — Ygritte breaks free, going from prisoner to predator in the span of 30 seconds.
– MR

10. Joffrey Baratheon (previously 10): No King Joff in this episode. Word in the alleys is cow turd is hard to wash off, so he’s still scrubbing away. Much like last week, Joffrey remains in the top 10 simply because he still sits on the Iron Throne. Cersei admits that she can’t control him and Tyrion hints that he may be lost. So who knows what the uncontrollable little shit will do next? I’m really hoping it involves a sword and spike, or perhaps he’ll mistake a cup of wildfire for wine and spontaneously burst into flames. Then again, after his last attempt at bedroom pleasures took a grotesque turn for the worse, before he dies part of me wants to see him have another go with a proper lady when he can’t do whatever he pleases. You know, just to hear him spit out “I know where I’m supposed to put it!” or romantically whisper “Is it in yet?”. Now that Sansa’s had her blood, perhaps we’ll get the chance.
– CW

On the King’s Road

Jorah Mormont: Such loyalty. Such longing. Such a jaw line! Dany might have too much dragon fever to see what’s right in front of her, but we know better: Jorah loves his Khaleesi, and that Season 1 snafu with the poisoned wine is now a distant memory. He deserves her trust, and he’s going to do whatever he must to earn it. His sword might have failed to draw blood from the dragon-stealing warlock, but at least Jorah was willing to wield it.
– MR

Jaqen H’ghar — A man was absent from this week’s episode, but that doesn’t make a man any less threatening. A man has already made two brilliant assassinations, after all, the latter via a poison dart that has aroused another man’s suspicion. But should a man worry? A man, and his beautiful flowing locks, shall soon see.
– BG

Daenerys Targaryen – Dany has nothing. No ship, no allies, no dragons. She continues to rebuff Jorah, the one person genuinely willing to help her, and is in danger of being taken hostage by Xaro, Pyat Pree(s) and his soul-sucking blue lips. But she’s Daenerys Targaryen, the mother of dragons! And she’s just so cute when she’s angry.
– BG

The Hound: No well-timed rescues, badass disembowelments or touching “little bird” pet names this week, but The Hound still managed to make an impact with his few precious moments of screen time. While most men might have met Sansa’s “thank you” with a standard “you’re welcome,” The Hound waved away the gratitude, saying “Killing’s the sweetest thing there is.”
– MR